Breathing Room

It's hard not to be busy in the summer. Especially when we Vermonters spend over half the year being cold and shoveling snow. Summer, with all of it's sweet adventures, sunshine, and berries seems too short. So, this family, just like many others, tries to pack in all the sunny day adventures it can into these days.

So far, we've been berry picking, swimming:


Camping and hiking (Liam's first trip!):



And in our spare time, Liam's been working on his blacksmithing skills!


So it's been fun, but this Mama is exhausted. With all our adventures, and a changing nap schedule, there has been very little breathing room in my days. It finally came to a head last weekend, and I really needed a BREAK with a capital B. I was thinking days, not hours. However, hours is what I got, thanks to a partner who recognized the desperation on his wife's face.

I ventured out on my own, finding that my relief was coupled with a nagging feeling of guilt that I was so excited to be on my own. I saw a wonderful play at NEYT that my talented niece was in, and then I ventured out for dinner by myself. It was a beautiful, not-too-hot day, and I spent a wonderful hour and a half eating at a picnic table in one of our beautiful parks, writing in my journal. I wrote about the nagging guilt; it didn't really help at first. I watched a family with a child about Liam's age come into the park and proceed to have fun romping around, and it looked so idyllic. My guilt grew. Finally, I worked through some of it, and came to the realization that time to oneself is not something to feel guilty about. We all need breathing room, or we get cramped up, stale, and crabby. We need it in all of our relationships, not just the mom-baby ones, but somehow I think moms tend to carry around a lot of guilt for needing that space. At least I do.

Feeling much more relaxed, I caught the mom's eye on the way out of the park, and we chatted for a few minutes about our little ones. When I mentioned my husband was giving me a much-needed break, she nodded knowingly, saying "that is so important!" I realized, again, that we are all a little more similar than we think. It is really easy for me to project my "shoulds" onto what I see around me, but some days we're ecstatic to be with our kiddos, and some days we're just tired. I will have to remember and re-learn this many times over, but I was glad for the break, and the reminder to make some breathing room part of the plan, too.